Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Of Dolphins and Macarenas

So, just where the heck have I been lately? Why no new entries?

I've been out of town. A cruise to Cabo, to be more specific. This was actually my second cruise this year. Kirsti won one playing Bingo on the last one, so here we were again on another Carnival Cruise Line.

I definitely had a good time, but I feel quite satiated when it comes to the whole cruising experience. To me, the best part of this one was when we got off the boat and went to Cabo - just as the best part of the last one was when we went to Catalina Island and Ensenada. Probably my biggest complaint was that we didn't have a lot of time to spend there, as we only got to do one thing and then walk around a bit until it was time to get back on the ship. (A few people didn't make it back to the ship! From what I heard, it was a couple of boys - ages unknown - and their father had to go back out to Cabo while the cruise ship left without all of them! Sucks to be them!)

Of course, even if everything else was a complete disaster, I wouldn't have traded anything for the best experience I've had in a long time - the Dolphin Swim in Cabo. Yup, that's me up there, feeding a sardine to a dolphin. (The pose was the trainer's idea.) The whole experience lasts only about a half hour, and you're with about seven or eight other people. Still, in that time you get to touch the dolphin, feed him, have him take you for a ride, and "dance" with him. When we saw the brochure for this activity, there was simply no way that I wasn't going to do it. Unfortunately, Kirsti didn't bring her swimsuit, so she could only watch. (Don't feel too bad for her though; she's going on yet another cruise - eight days - and there are dolphin-related activities where she'll be going.)

So, that was awesome, and walking around Cabo was fun. I even went to Cabo Wabo for the sole reason that Sammy Hagar owns it. Luckily, they serve some damn good food there, as the burrito that I had was really something else. It had an awesome sauce on it and the chicken was so tender that I probably could have eaten it plain and unseasoned and still enjoyed it. We also stopped off at another restaurant where I probably had the best margarita of my life.

As for the boat itself, I feel like I got my fill of all that when I went on the first cruise. Honestly, I get a bit of cabin fever, and since I'm not into gambling or socializing with strangers, there isn't much for me to do other than the occasional trivia game and food buffet. I spent a lot of our cruise day reading, which isn't really so bad of a thing. It was relaxing, and all the distractions of home were far behind me. Of course, I should also point out that I got to spend some quality time with wifey, and that can never be bad.

Ultimately though, I think that cruising is definitely something that's more for people with extroverted personalities. I was able to muster up a little bit of small talk with the people who sat at our table, but I'm not the kind of person who wants to go around meeting a lot of people.

Oh, and I should probably embarass myself enough to say that I had a very "me" moment, as I doubt that any other person on Earth could relate to this - but everybody who knows me won't find it too surprising. One night in the dining room after desert had been served, a fella got on the microphone and said that it was "showtime." I remember the last cruise where all the waiters had to put on a little dance routine for everybody, and then they'd get people to come up and dance with them.

Personally, I absolutely hate this sort of a thing. I don't mind dancing, but dammit, if I'm going to do it, then it has to be my decision. (Believe it or not, I'm not a good dancer, but when I'm in the mood I don't let that stop me.) I managed to luck out, but you'd see them go up to people who'd say no at first, and then they'd take them by the hand and convince them to get up anyway. People have tried this tactic with me, and it doesn't work. I don't know what it is, but it starts to become a matter of pride with me. If I say no to something, then that's what I meant. I never mean, "No, but you just might convince me if you keep trying." Is that cutting off my nose to spite my face? Perhaps, but that's my gut-reaction.

So, I immediately started to get nervous when they announced this. I didn't even want to be in the position where I'd have to say no in the first place. (Anybody who's ever read my Eagle-Man stories - you know how he's always anticipating things that MIGHT happen and then starts to stress out about them? He does that because I do that.) And then, a familiar tune started up and the guy announced, "I'm sure that you all know how to do the Macarena, right?"

Oh, hell no. There is no way I'm doing the Macarena. I'll take a Shadrach-like stance and go into the fire before I do that moronic dance.

So, this sent me into "fight or flight" mode, and I quickly turned to Kirsti and said, "I've got to go. Right now. I gotta go." I then briskly walked out - somewhat rudely as I didn't say anything to the people at our table. What was I gonna say? "Sorry, but I hate the Macarena so much that I have to leave." Of course, that would be the truth, and now that I think about it...that's probably what I should have done.


Ingrid said...

Lance, glad you had a good time and it might surprise you that you are exactly like me when it comes to dancing on command. I get exactly the same feeling and would rather leave then be forced to "perform" like this. Now, your father never shied away from anything like that. He danced with the Hula girls in Hawaii and the belly dancers at any given chance. I also have absolutely no desire to ever go on a cruise.

Carol Parker said...

Just wanted to tell you, if you loved the dolphin swim, you'll love a new release: FLUKES, a novel, an ebook. It raises the question, can dolphins cure terminal illnesses in humans, by swimming with them. Lots of suspense and even romance. A good read. Go to: www.eloquentbooks.com/flukes.html

Lance Christian Johnson said...

can dolphins cure terminal illnesses in humans, by swimming with them

I wasn't aware that this was even a question that anybody was asking.

Kirsti said...

I'm a little confused as to why you wanted to go on this cruise with me if you had your fill of cruising after the last one. You told me that you wanted to go without me even asking. Don't get me wrong...you're the first person that I would want to go with me on this trip, but not if your heart wasn't into it.

As for cruising being more for people who are more extroverted, I tend to disagree. You're not forced to do anything you don't want to do or talk to anyone you don't want to talk to. I don't consider myself to be extroverted at all and I really like cruising.

Lance Christian Johnson said...

Perhaps I goofed something up, but what I meant was that I've had my fill of cruises now that I've gone on a second one.

Regarding the extrovert thing, all I meant is that it has more things that would appeal to one. That's not to say that it's definitely not for introverts.

Kirsti said...

"As for the boat itself, I feel like I got my fill of all that when I went on the first cruise."

That was the line that I was referring to.

But, I think I understand.

Lance Christian Johnson said...

Okay, I see. I should have elaborated.

Ingrid said...

Lance, Kirsti, you guys are funny, and obviously married. I spelled "then" wrong, it should have been than. I know the difference, but I don't know the difference of introverted vs extroverted liking cruises or not.