Wednesday, February 6, 2008

So dumb it hurts my head...

I'm not in the mood to write much today, but I just overheard the song, "Life is a Highway." Dear Lord, but that's one the dumbest songs ever. Now, I don't believe that every song needs to have some sort of deep meaning or intellectual significance. However, if you're going to use a metaphor, have it make some sense.

"Life is a highway, I want to ride it all night long." What the flipping hell does that even mean? How does one ride life all night long? Please, don't explain it. If you have to explain a metaphor, then it's either 1) not a good one or 2) too clever for the person who doesn't understand it. I make a living explaining the metaphors of Shakespeare, so forgive my hubris if I don't think that it's the latter explanation. (See, I use words like hubris! That means I'm smart.)

I mean, does he just want to live life all night long? Are highways typically the sort of thing that one wants to ride on all night long? Does he enjoy being stuck in traffic?

I'll clue you in. It doesn't mean anything.

People should be licensed before they're allowed to use metaphors.

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