Friday, May 30, 2008

Praise Jeebus for Michelle Malkin

Michelle Malkin, who is apparently trying to win the "most reasonable conservative" award from Ann Coulter, has recently pointed out the truth about Rachel Ray - she is a terrorist sympathizer. Oh, and you thought she was just a cute, perky, kinda annoying, slightly ubiquitous talk show host/chef. If you thought that, you probably love Osama bin Laden.

In her blog, Malkin points out (quite correctly!) that Rachel Ray's scarf in a recent Dunkin' Donuts ad is, in fact, a keffiyeh, which is a symbol for the Palestinian people. Therefore, this proves that Ray is part of a conspiracy to show support toward Palestinian terrorists. Obviously. Why would Dunkin' Donuts do such a thing? Probably because Jews hate donuts, as they feel that they're an abomination of the bagel, non doubt. I don't know about you, but seeing Rachel Ray in that ad makes me want to wipe Israel off the face of the Earth. Luckily, people like Malkin are around to point these things out, and now I see the light.

So, thank you, Michelle Malkin. However, you don't go far enough. There are several teachers on my campus who have mustaches! You know who else had a mustache, right? Hitler! Stalin! Geraldo! There are also some teachers who are completely bald - just like Mussolini! It's also a fact that we have immigrants from Mongolia in our school. You haven't forgotten about Genghis Khan, have you?

Won't somebody please think of the children!

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